It’s been over for a while now.
It took a lot to delete your number.
Even longer to block you on Facebook.
I was still holding on;
Afraid to let go.
Except, the minute I realized it could never go back to the way it was,
Was the moment I could move on—
Or at least try to.
They say it gets easier each day.
I know I wake up further from what I used to be,
But some days are easier than others.
I mean, if I were to say I didn’t miss you,
That would be a lie.
Was it real?
I’m not sure.
I may have thought it was,
But living like we were;
Wasn’t what I had in mind for my happily ever after.
I really wanted to believe the lies;
Your actions proved otherwise.
I want that.
And so we sat,
Alone in the dark at your mom’s house
High AF laying on her couch.
One word: Ouch.
I swear I was more addicted to you than the pills themselves.
So yeah, you were my world.
And who was I?
Just your ticket to the other side—
Riding high on number nine,
I thought you were going to save me;
Until I realized that was never going to happen.
In short, I needed out.
So that’s exactly what I did.
If I can be honest, I thought you’d follow,
You never did.
I wanted to yell at you,
But nothing would come out.
I see now that it wasn’t going to ever stop
Until we stopped it.
I should have learned from my past,
Which you never failed to hold against me—
Until you backed me into a corner,
There was nothing left to do but…
Except, I needed this crash.
My car accident was the sign I had been waiting for.
But I was too stoned to know for sure.
Get out while you can.
Quit while you’re ahead.
I couldn’t stop.
You wouldn’t let me.
That was then.
This is now.